What does he mean?

Do you ever listen to men and wonder what they're actually trying to say?

Check out our guide to manspeak for a handy translation of some of their favourite phrases:

He says: "You deserve someone better than me."
He means: "I've found someone better than you."

He says: "I just can't get the hang of this Brillo pad thingy."
He means: "Isn't this women's work?"

He says: "Is that a new dress?"
He means: "I've taped over your only copy of Sleepless In Seattle."

He says: "Just leave the dishes - I'll do them later."
He means: "Maybe in a week or so, when the only things still clean are two bent fish knives and the lid of your Gran's best marmalade dish."

He says: "It's probably my fault."
He means: "It's definitely my fault but there's no way I'm going to apologise and the football's coming on."

He says: "Football's finished."
He means: "Time for a bit of hanky panky."

He says: "We all need our own space."
He means: "I'm up to something."

He says: "No reason at all - I just remembered how much you like flowers."
He means: "Forgive me partner, I have sinned."

He says: "Where do we keep the washing-up liquid again?"
He means: "I've run out of shampoo."

He says: "I thought I'd make my special pasta tonight, if you don't mind washing up afterwards."
He means: "That's the one which leaves the kitchen covered in flour, soggy pasta stuck to the sink and the walls looking like something out of a Tarantino movie."

He says: "There's only one KitKat left."
He means: "What are you going to have?

He says: "My flat's a bit of a mess, I'm afraid."
He means: "OK, so it's World War Three-and-a-Half, but how did I know I was going to get lucky tonight?"

He says: "I'm afraid the bathroom seems to be rather lacking the woman's touch."
He means: "Perhaps you could give it a bit of a once-over after breakfast."

He says: "Don't tell me you didn't get my text?"
He means: "But only because I didn't send it."

He says: "I just couldn't get away from the office."
He means: "I got landed with the first round for 10 of us."