"Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."Chris Rock on Lana Turner
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."Chris Rock on Ron White
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."Chris Rock on Bill Cosby
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."Chris Rock on Jim Carrey
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."Chris Rock on Elbert Hubbard
"I think my best work is when I'm kind of in charge."
"I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson."
"Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?"
"I love being famous. It's almost like being white."
"Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous."
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