"I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator."
"It is strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely."Emo Philips on Albert Einstein
"Alone we can do so little together we can do so much."Emo Philips on Helen Keller
"It's often just enough to be with someone. I don't need to touch them. Not even talk. A feeling passes between you both. You're not alone."Emo Philips on Marilyn Monroe
"Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation for it is better to be alone than in bad company."Emo Philips on George Washington
"I restore myself when I'm alone."Emo Philips on Marilyn Monroe
"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."
"Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it's been a pretty good day."
"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."
"How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand."
"I was the kid next door's imaginary friend."
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