"Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures."
"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect."Evan Esar on Mark Twain
"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax."Evan Esar on Albert Einstein
"There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure."Evan Esar on Colin Powell
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."Evan Esar on Dale Carnegie
"If there is anything that a man can do well, I say let him do it. Give him a chance."Evan Esar on Abraham Lincoln
"Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either."
"America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week."
"The girl with a future avoids a man with a past."
"Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it."
"Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment."
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