"I'm not a bad driver. And I never will be because I took lessons when I was quite a boy. I never had to pass a test because there wasn't such a thing when I first started driving a motor car. So I didn't have to pass one."
"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 MPG."Richard Murdoch on Bill Gates
"There was a time in my life when I thought I had everything - millions of dollars, mansions, cars, nice clothes, beautiful women, and every other materialistic thing you can imagine. Now I struggle for peace."Richard Murdoch on Richard Pryor
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."Richard Murdoch on Erma Bombeck
"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone."Richard Murdoch on Steven Wright
"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."Richard Murdoch on Steven Wright
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