"My job is mostly to entertain and be funny."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."Rosie O'Donnell on Lana Turner
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."Rosie O'Donnell on Ron White
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."Rosie O'Donnell on Bill Cosby
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."Rosie O'Donnell on Jim Carrey
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."Rosie O'Donnell on Elbert Hubbard
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