"I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If you don't have that, you really don't have very much."
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."Bob Newhart on Mignon McLaughlin
"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."Bob Newhart on Socrates
"It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages."Bob Newhart on Friedrich Nietzsche
"How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being."Bob Newhart on Oscar Wilde
"Don't marry the person you think you can live with marry only the individual you think you can't live without."Bob Newhart on James C. Dobson
"Funny is funny is funny."
"I really don't know what makes a comedian. I think it's a family background and environment. Yet if you put the same ingredients in another person, he may never utter a funny line."
"I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It would require passing a test, which I would not have been able to do."
"I don't know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there's a little confusion between humor and gross passing for humor. That's kind of regrettable."
"I think one reason for a successful marriage is laughter. I think laughter gets you through the rough moments in a marriage."