"I realized women and humor were linked very closely."
"A joke is a very serious thing."Craig Ferguson on Winston Churchill
"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."Craig Ferguson on Mark Twain
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing."Craig Ferguson on William James
"If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."Craig Ferguson on Mahatma Gandhi
"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road."Craig Ferguson on Henry Ward Beecher
"I think that clearly it has an influence, to be coming of age during the punk rock era, to come from a difficult and sporadically violent background, to have been in and out of such chaos, I think it actually helps. But I don't know for sure."
"It's the beauty and curse of doing a daily show. Some days you've got nothing to talk about and other days Dick Cheney shoots his lawyer in the face and everyone is happy."
"It's like, it's kind of like if you ever had a car and it was a bit of a clunker but you love it, that's my show. It's a bit of a clunker but I know where everything is and I like it."
"It's not that we fly by the seat of our pants. We're not afraid of failure."
"Why do people do things that they fear? It may be that the fear contains information. Something can be interesting if you get to the other side of that fear."