"What's so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It's like a shock and aw shucks campaign."
"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect."Dennis Miller on Mark Twain
"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax."Dennis Miller on Albert Einstein
"There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure."Dennis Miller on Colin Powell
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."Dennis Miller on Dale Carnegie
"If there is anything that a man can do well, I say let him do it. Give him a chance."Dennis Miller on Abraham Lincoln
"I didn't know my Dad - he moved out early. And my mom's politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn't think about Democrats or Republicans. She thought about who made sense. I've been both in my life."
"The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country."
"You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R's only one begins with an R."
"The American education system couldn't be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood."
"There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it."