"The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it."
"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 MPG."Dudley Moore on Bill Gates
"There was a time in my life when I thought I had everything - millions of dollars, mansions, cars, nice clothes, beautiful women, and every other materialistic thing you can imagine. Now I struggle for peace."Dudley Moore on Richard Pryor
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."Dudley Moore on Erma Bombeck
"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone."Dudley Moore on Steven Wright
"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."Dudley Moore on Steven Wright
"I certainly did feel inferior. Because of class. Because of strength. Because of height. I guess if I'd been able to hit somebody in the nose, I wouldn't have been a comic."