"I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."Dylan Moran on Lana Turner
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."Dylan Moran on Ron White
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."Dylan Moran on Bill Cosby
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."Dylan Moran on Jim Carrey
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."Dylan Moran on Elbert Hubbard
"I'm actually about as famous as a fourth division footballer from the 70s."
"The truth is that I'm constitutionally incapable of doing an ordinary job."
"I think that women just have a primeval instinct to make soup, which they will try to foist on anybody who looks like a likely candidate."