"He taught me never to smile, which helps me when I visit disaster sites."
"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."Emo Philips on Leo Buscaglia
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."Emo Philips on Dr. Seuss
"Look back, and smile on perils past."Emo Philips on Walter Scott
"A warm smile is the universal language of kindness."Emo Philips on William Arthur Ward
"A smile is a curve that sets everything straight."Emo Philips on Phyllis Diller
"I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator."
"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."
"Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it's been a pretty good day."
"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."
"How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand."