"I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage."
"I'll never stop dreaming that one day we can be a real family, together, all of us laughing and talking, loving and understanding, not looking at the past but only to the future."Erma Bombeck on LaToya Jackson
"If a country is to be corruption free and become a nation of beautiful minds, I strongly feel there are three key societal members who can make a difference. They are the father, the mother and the teacher."Erma Bombeck on Abdul Kalam
"Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten."Erma Bombeck on David Ogden Stiers
"The love of family and the admiration of friends is much more important than wealth and privilege."Erma Bombeck on Charles Kuralt
"Sister is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strongest relationship."Erma Bombeck on Margaret Mead
"Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub."
"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."
"A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday."
"Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago."
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."