"What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?"
"It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men."Erma Bombeck on Frederick Douglass
"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."Erma Bombeck on Anais Nin
"Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance."Erma Bombeck on Oscar Wilde
"Without feelings of respect, what is there to distinguish men from beasts?"Erma Bombeck on Confucius
"Man becomes great exactly in the degree in which he works for the welfare of his fellow-men."Erma Bombeck on Mahatma Gandhi
"Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub."
"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."
"A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday."
"Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago."
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."