"If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck."
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."Jeff Foxworthy on Maya Angelou
"Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can't ride you unless your back is bent."Jeff Foxworthy on Martin Luther King, Jr.
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."Jeff Foxworthy on Reinhold Niebuhr
"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek."Jeff Foxworthy on Barack Obama
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world."Jeff Foxworthy on Mahatma Gandhi
"My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!"
"My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this."
"I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did."
"You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education."
"If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'"