"That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring."
"Great minds discuss ideas average minds discuss events small minds discuss people."Jeff Foxworthy on Eleanor Roosevelt
"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds."Jeff Foxworthy on Albert Einstein
"Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them."Jeff Foxworthy on William Shakespeare
"One sees great things from the valley only small things from the peak."Jeff Foxworthy on Gilbert K. Chesterton
"All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope."Jeff Foxworthy on Winston Churchill
"My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!"
"If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck."
"My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this."
"I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did."
"You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education."