"You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'"
"God gave us the gift of life it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well."Jerry Seinfeld on Voltaire
"The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate."Jerry Seinfeld on Oprah Winfrey
"My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me."Jerry Seinfeld on Jim Valvano
"I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity."Jerry Seinfeld on Eleanor Roosevelt
"The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance."Jerry Seinfeld on Brian Tracy
"It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper."
"Well, all comedy starts with anger. You get angry, and its never for a good reason, right? You know its not a good reason. And then you try and work it from there."
"When I jumped off a roof in Cannes in a bee costume, I looked ridiculous. But this is my business I have to humiliate myself."
"The first real thought that I had of something that I might do was to write for car magazines, because I always had a car thing."
"I love being a dad. I just love it."