"They don't like thinking in medical school. They memorize - that's all they want you to do. You must not think."
"I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course."John Backus on Groucho Marx
"A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running."John Backus on Groucho Marx
"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."John Backus on Erma Bombeck
"They certainly give very strange names to diseases."John Backus on Plato
"Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it."John Backus on Erma Bombeck