"I don't think women are better than men, I think men are a lot worse than women."
"A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water."Louis C. K. on Eleanor Roosevelt
"I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot."Louis C. K. on Marilyn Monroe
"Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent."Louis C. K. on Friedrich Nietzsche
"The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles."Louis C. K. on Ralph Waldo Emerson
"As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot."Louis C. K. on John Lennon
"It's kind of awkward to eat alone in a restaurant because everybody's looking at me."
"To me, art supplies are always okay to buy."
"I have a crazy amount of different jobs, so the way I manage that is to not do more than one at a time. It's like old computers that had small memory chips, they would do something called swapping, where they would fill the memory with one task, do it and get it out."
"When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, 'This is just dumb.'"
"I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work."