"Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever."
"A joke is a very serious thing."Mark Twain on Winston Churchill
"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."Mark Twain on Mark Twain
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing."Mark Twain on William James
"If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."Mark Twain on Mahatma Gandhi
"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road."Mark Twain on Henry Ward Beecher
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."
"Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been."
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."
"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured."
"When angry, count to four when very angry, swear."