"Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed."
"Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future."Mark Twain on John F. Kennedy
"Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress but I repeat myself."Mark Twain on Mark Twain
"One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors."Mark Twain on Plato
"If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand."Mark Twain on Milton Friedman
"It is enough that the people know there was an election. The people who cast the votes decide nothing. The people who count the votes decide everything."Mark Twain on Joseph Stalin
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."
"Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been."
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."
"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured."
"When angry, count to four when very angry, swear."