"We have the best government that money can buy."
"A wise and frugal Government, which shall restrain men from injuring one another, which shall leave them otherwise free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned. This is the sum of good government, and this is necessary to close the circlue of our felicities."Mark Twain on Thomas Jefferson
"The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter."Mark Twain on Winston Churchill
"I hope we shall crush in its birth the aristocracy of our monied corporations which dare already to challenge our government to a trial by strength, and bid defiance to the laws of our country."Mark Twain on Thomas Jefferson
"Government is not reason it is not eloquent it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master."Mark Twain on George Washington
"Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil in its worst state, an intolerable one."Mark Twain on Thomas Paine
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."
"Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been."
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."
"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured."
"When angry, count to four when very angry, swear."