"Women encourage men to be childish, then scold them."
"A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water."Mason Cooley on Eleanor Roosevelt
"I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot."Mason Cooley on Marilyn Monroe
"Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent."Mason Cooley on Friedrich Nietzsche
"The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles."Mason Cooley on Ralph Waldo Emerson
"As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot."Mason Cooley on John Lennon
"The wisdom of age: don't stop walking."
"Old age: I fall asleep during the funerals of my friends."
"Staid middle age loves the hurricane passions of opera."
"Middle age went by while I was mourning for my lost youth."
"The lonely become either thoughtful or empty."