"A lot of people into Tool, for some reason, are not interested in humor."
"A joke is a very serious thing."Maynard James Keenan on Winston Churchill
"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."Maynard James Keenan on Mark Twain
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing."Maynard James Keenan on William James
"If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."Maynard James Keenan on Mahatma Gandhi
"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road."Maynard James Keenan on Henry Ward Beecher
"The idea is, if I can't heal from my art, then how can you heal?"
"Once you take yourself too seriously the art will suffer."
"If you take different mythologies from different cultures, the names may change and the story lines may vary but there is always something in common."
"If the education of our kids comes from radio, television, newspapers - if that's where they get most of their knowledge from, and not from the schools, then the powers that be are definitely in charge, because they own all those outlets."
"The record company's worst fear is that you'll fall in love or get rich."