"Sudden money is going from zero to two hundred dollars a week. The rest doesn't count."
"When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life now that I am old I know that it is."Neil Simon on Oscar Wilde
"A little thought and a little kindness are often worth more than a great deal of money."Neil Simon on John Ruskin
"Money has never made man happy, nor will it, there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more of it one has the more one wants."Neil Simon on Benjamin Franklin
"The lack of money is the root of all evil."Neil Simon on Mark Twain
"Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it."Neil Simon on Mark Twain
"You must realize that honorary degrees are given generally to people whose SAT scores were too low to get them into schools the regular way. As a matter of fact, it was my SAT scores that led me into my present vocation in life, comedy."
"Money brings some happiness. But after a certain point, it just brings more money."
"Take care of him. And make him feel important. And if you can do that, you'll have a happy and wonderful marriage. Like two out of every ten couples."
"Sports is the only entertainment where, no matter how many times you go back, you never know the ending."