"My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was proud of that."
"It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father."Paul Lynde on Pope John XXIII
"When one has not had a good father, one must create one."Paul Lynde on Friedrich Nietzsche
"My father? I never knew him. Never even seen a picture of him."Paul Lynde on Eminem
"I am not ashamed to say that no man I ever met was my father's equal, and I never loved any other man as much."Paul Lynde on Hedy Lamarr
"Whoever does not have a good father should procure one."Paul Lynde on Friedrich Nietzsche
"Politicians... talk in generalities and lies, and I think they've caused all our grief. They're so awful, they're really funny. I hate thinking this because my dad loved politics."
"If I ever completely lost my nervousness I would be frightened half to death."
"I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church."
"I was obsessed with being rich and famous."
"Sandwiches are wonderful. You don't need a spoon or a plate!"