"The car is a character in the piece - I've never liked the car, I submitted to it's objectionable popularity."
"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 MPG."Paul M. Glaser on Bill Gates
"There was a time in my life when I thought I had everything - millions of dollars, mansions, cars, nice clothes, beautiful women, and every other materialistic thing you can imagine. Now I struggle for peace."Paul M. Glaser on Richard Pryor
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."Paul M. Glaser on Erma Bombeck
"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone."Paul M. Glaser on Steven Wright
"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."Paul M. Glaser on Steven Wright
"I've been writing a lot, I've a few projects I'm trying to finance, I do some acting, I do some directing... Apart from that, if I could get lower that a ten handicap on my golf game I'd be thrilled."