"I always just wanted to be funny. I never really planned to be scary."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."R. L. Stine on Lana Turner
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."R. L. Stine on Ron White
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."R. L. Stine on Bill Cosby
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."R. L. Stine on Jim Carrey
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."R. L. Stine on Elbert Hubbard
"Everything that has happened to me has been amazing and surprising."
"I've never dreamed of a story idea. I have such boring dreams."
"Most fears are basic: fear of the dark, fear of going down in the basement, fear of weird sounds, fear that somebody is waiting for you in your closet. Those kinds of things stay with you no matter what age."
"I started writing when I was 9 years old. I was like this weird kid who would just stay in my room, typing little funny magazines and drawing comic strips."
"I'm obsessed with radio. It's a good start to Sunday morning."