"When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."Richard Lewis on Lana Turner
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."Richard Lewis on Ron White
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."Richard Lewis on Bill Cosby
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."Richard Lewis on Jim Carrey
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."Richard Lewis on Elbert Hubbard
"I love being famous. It validates that I have something to say."
"I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back."