"Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid."
"It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men."Rita Rudner on Frederick Douglass
"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."Rita Rudner on Anais Nin
"Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance."Rita Rudner on Oscar Wilde
"Without feelings of respect, what is there to distinguish men from beasts?"Rita Rudner on Confucius
"Man becomes great exactly in the degree in which he works for the welfare of his fellow-men."Rita Rudner on Mahatma Gandhi
"My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head."
"I get a lot of return business. I think it's all those years I put in traveling around the country people saw me before and had a good time so they want to see me again."
"To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'"
"My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to."
"When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always."