"Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist."
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."Sarah Silverman on Lana Turner
"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."Sarah Silverman on Ron White
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."Sarah Silverman on Bill Cosby
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."Sarah Silverman on Jim Carrey
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."Sarah Silverman on Elbert Hubbard
"I like my life alone."
"And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major to arts and sciences, and my dad cut a deal with me: He said if I'd quit school he'd pay my rent for the next three years, as if I were in school."
"But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough."
"I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion."
"Some people say my humor focuses too much on stereotypes. It doesn't. It focuses on facts."