"A pet store is a celebration of dogs' existence and an explosion of options. About cats, a pet store seems to say, 'Here, we couldn't think of anything else.' Cats are the Hanukkah of the animal world in this way. They are feted quietly and happily by a minority, but there's only so much hoopla applicable to them."
"No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens."Sloane Crosley on Abraham Lincoln
"I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals."Sloane Crosley on Winston Churchill
"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."Sloane Crosley on Robert A. Heinlein
"Time spent with cats is never wasted."Sloane Crosley on Sigmund Freud
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself."Sloane Crosley on Josh Billings
"You can't possibly fathom the ins and outs of a prepubescent beauty treatment until you've felt the strange but exhilarating tingle of a cottage-cheese-and-Pop-Rocks facial."
"Since graduation, I have measured time in 4-by-5-inch pieces of paper, four days on the left and three on the right. Every social engagement, interview, reading, flight, doctor's appointment, birthday and dry-cleaning reminder has been handwritten between metal loops."
"I'm a summer baby, so I usually have my birthday as a good summer memory."
"The Queen of Crafts herself, Martha Stewart, and I have the same birthday. I prefer to think it's the glue-gun wielding, perfect-tart-producing Martha and not the copper pan-throwing, jail-going Martha. But I suppose if I am going to share a calendar square with some of Martha, I have to share it with all of Martha."
"The year most of my high school friends and I got our driver's permits, the coolest thing one could do was stand outside after school and twirl one's car keys like a lifeguard whistle. That jingling sound meant freedom and power."