"My dad is a very quick-witted, sarcastic, dry, humorous guy, whereas my mom's very silly, and that side of the family is very musical."
"It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father."Tim Heidecker on Pope John XXIII
"When one has not had a good father, one must create one."Tim Heidecker on Friedrich Nietzsche
"My father? I never knew him. Never even seen a picture of him."Tim Heidecker on Eminem
"I am not ashamed to say that no man I ever met was my father's equal, and I never loved any other man as much."Tim Heidecker on Hedy Lamarr
"Whoever does not have a good father should procure one."Tim Heidecker on Friedrich Nietzsche
"I think the great sketch shows, like 'Python' and 'Mr. Show,' they didn't stick around for very long. There's something kind of cool about that."
"Most of my ideas just come out funny."
"Sometimes laughing isn't the best judge of what's funny, 'cause I think there's a lot of things that are really funny that don't make you laugh, that don't make you physically, audibly make a noise, but is something that is much more powerful than that."
"There is nothing funny about a well-adjusted, intelligent person making the right choices."
"I'm always in situations where you can't be funny, and yet I want to do it anyway."