"I think that we're in a really amazing time, where there are really a lot of really fantastic female actresses and comedians. I imagine there's just a lot of opportunity for women to have powerful roles. Or it's just that there's more women writing TV. Women tend to maybe write strong women."
"Sometimes I think my husband is so amazing that I don't know why he's with me. I don't know whether I'm good enough. But if I make him happy, then I'm everything I want to be."Whitney Cummings on Angelina Jolie
"If you tell people where to go, but not how to get there, you'll be amazed at the results."Whitney Cummings on George S. Patton
"It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit."Whitney Cummings on Harry S. Truman
"If you set goals and go after them with all the determination you can muster, your gifts will take you places that will amaze you."Whitney Cummings on Les Brown
"Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen."Whitney Cummings on Conan O'Brien
"There was a time in L.A. when I drove to 7-Eleven to go grocery shopping, and I locked my keys in my car, which wasn't insured. My wallet was in there, and I couldn't call AAA, because I only had $7 in my bank account. It was one of those moments where I was like, 'O.K., I literally have nothing right now.'"
"I'm the one who's dating the craft-service guy instead of the producer. Plus, if a producer is going to date a hot young thing, I'm probably not the first person on their list - the weird, quirky, funny girl."
"I feel like, in a lot of shows where the woman is in charge, the woman is this ball buster and the guy is sort of weak and spineless. And that's never been my experience in a relationship. I think it's much more interesting that the guy is the boss. And there are stakes."