13:37 15 November 2010
When your loved one tells you your relationship is over, a mixture of emotions can overwhelm you: first theres sadness, denial, rage and finally acceptance.
Its within the early stages of a break up that we are most vulnerable, determined to wreak revenge on our ex, tell everyone how much of a bad person they were and finally end up in a drunken mess, crying with our mates.
You can avoid these temptations, however, with just a few helpful tips.
Accept how you feel
You need to give yourself time to get over the shock of this loss. By all means call your friends for advice, but avoid going out and getting bladdered. Youll only feel worse in the morning and the repercussions could be devastating; think very bad pictures turning up on Facebook which your ex and his friends can see.
Remember your dignity
OK, so you want to tell the world what an idiot they are for dumping you and whilst this may be true, its better to avoid embarrassing break up moments by doing a Carrie Bradshaw and mouthing off about them in front of their friends. If you see them out and about, avoid them at all costs.
Dont avoid the healing process
You have to let yourself heal naturally, not matter how long that takes. Dont beat yourself up about it if it takes you a year to fully get over someone. It just means that you felt a lot for them. After all, we all need to feel something in order for us to be human.
Write a diary
A diary can help you reflect on everything thats been going on in your head and stands as a source of venting which you can look back on when your head is clearer to fully deduce what may have gone wrong.
Look to the future
You broke up with someone, so what? Think about all those presents you wont have to buy them, all those boring and endless games of football you wont have to watch and how much time you can now spend on yourself.
Something and somebody much better will come along to brighten your days and whether its a month or a year from now, you will look back and wonder why you spent so much time crying over them.
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